King Kong Yet Again

I don’t know what it is about film nerds between the ages of 35 and 50, but they all seem to have this same strange obsession with King Kong. It was that obsession with lead Peter Jackson to make his version, even though it probably wasn’t necessary, and I suppose it’s a similar obsession which has lead a company called Spirit Pictures to buy up the rights and start making plans to do King Kong yet again. Please, Hollywood, give it a rest. Big monkey good. No more big monkey needed.

The movie will probably be a prequel, since Variety says the rights they’ve purchased are to a prequel book called Kong: King of Skull Island. It’s all about the mega-ape’s fight to kick the ass of everything else on his island home and become master of his domain. You’d see other giant gorillas and dinosaurs and all kinds of massive creatures which you only got a tiny taste of in previous Kong iterations.

This project has been kicking around for awhile. For instance the teaser poster included in this story came from a 2008 attempt by Fantastic Films International to get a movie made from the book. It would seem it went nowhere. If we’re lucky, maybe this attempt will once again meet the same fate.

It’s not that I don’t like King Kong. I respect the original movie as an innovator, a vital key in making movies what they are today. Watched now it doesn’t hold up as well as some pretend (and I'm not just talking special effects), but that’s ok. Since the original it’s been done and it’s been redone and redone and redone again. I even really liked the Peter Jackson version and hell, have a soft place in my heart for some of the cheesy sequels and remakes done before it. King Kong vs Godzilla is a blast. The point is, we’ve got this Kong guy covered. Now a prequel? Really no thanks. If you’re really intent on making something about giant monsters, how about somebody finally make a good Godzilla movie? Oh yeah, they did. It was called Cloverfield. Great. So we’ve had giant robots, retro giant robots, mega gorillas, super dinosaurs, and massive thingys from outer space. Now we’re back to monkeys? Stop! Done. No more please.

This is becoming worse than the overabundance of superhero movies. If you must make this kind of movie, someone get on an NC-17 version of Attack of the 50ft Woman. At least it’d be different.

Josh Tyler