I will admit, I wasn’t really all that hyped about Doug Liman’s Road House remake before the movie debuted on Prime Video in March. But after reading what my colleague, Eric Eisenberg, had to say about the film in his four-star review, as well as other critical responses to the Jake Gyllenhaal action movie, I decided to give it a proper shot. Guess what? I ABSOLUTELY LOVED THIS MOVIE!
This felt like a throwback to the fun action flicks of my childhood, and I just couldn’t get enough of it. From Conor McGregor’s off-the-wall performance to random bits of dialogue my coworkers and I have been quoting to straight-up bonkers fight sequences, I was in hog heaven.
I Haven't Been Able To Stop Thinking About Conor McGregor's Insane Energy In Road House
There’s a mashup video of Conor McGregor being edited into the Mission: Impossible franchise and various Fast & Furious movies that’s pure chaos. While I long thought that was the most unhinged thing I would ever see involving the former UFC champ, that paled in comparison to his portrayal of Knox in Road House.
Seriously, I just can’t stop thinking about this jacked-up and psychotic villain whose only mission in the movie is to punch, kick, punch, drink coconut milk, and beat the mess out of anyone and everyone in his way. He’s less of a character and more of a force of nature, one that steals the show and makes the movie so much better.
Listening To 'Kokomo' On The Way To The Hospital
Another thing I loved about Road House was the fact the movie never took itself too seriously, and just about every intense sequence was countered by a hilarious moment, which created a nice effect.
About 20 minutes into the movie, after Dalton puts a beating on a group of bikers, he offers to give them a ride to the nearest hospital. It’s a short scene with very little dialogue, but the fact that the Beach Boys’ “Kokomo” is playing on the car radio is like the chef’s kiss of this sequence. It’s so random, so wholesome, and so effective.
I Don't Know Why But I Really Like That I Know The Road House Is About 25 Minutes From The Nearest Hospital
Did you know there is a hospital that is only about 25 minutes away from the Road House in Glass Key? Well, the movie makes sure you know several times.
I don’t know much about the hospital (Is it even in Glass Key or further along the highway?), but I do know that you can go from being in a bar fight to seeking emergency trauma care in under 30 minutes, depending on traffic. Broken arm, broken finger, an old and infected knife wound? You’re covered!
Once I Got Used To Them, The Fight Scenes Were So Absurdly Awesome
I didn’t immediately like the fight sequences in Road House, but not because I thought they looked bad. Instead, it had more to do with me having motion sickness from the way the camera jumps and pans around the brawlers. But, once I got used to the almost video game aesthetic, I fell in love with the way director Doug Liman filmed the fights.
They were so brutal, so absurd, and so awesome! Shooting them this way also helped with the suspension of disbelief, especially when Dalton and Knox started going at it in the second half of the movie.
Jake Gyllenhaal Pulled Off The 'Friendly Reluctant Badass' Character So, So Well
Much like Patrick Swayze’s John Dalton in the original Road House, Jake Gyllenhaal’s take on the character in the remake is a badass. On top of that, both are depicted as friendly enough guys who don’t really lose their cool (that UFC fight notwithstanding), and that’s really what makes them so appealing in the first place.
Gyllenhaal could have totally approached the character from the standpoint of your typical badass who jumps in and takes care of business, but instead he takes a more restrained and somewhat goofy approach.
I Know The Boat Crash Makes Absolutely No Sense, But That Sort Of Makes The Whole Sequence Even Better
I love big, dumb moments in action movies, especially those that defy all logic and the laws of gravity. That said, Road House gave me one of the biggest, dumbest, and most head-scratching boat crashes I’ve seen in a long time, and I LOVED it.
It makes no sense when Dalton, Ellie (Daniela Melchior), and Ben Brandt (Billy Magnussen) crash a speed boat into the reef in front of the Road House and Ben is thrown flying into the sky, only to survive. But, I’m a sucker for this type of thing.
The Dynamic Shared By Dalton And Moe Throughout The Movie Brings So Much Joy To My Life For Some Reason
Arturo Castro’s Moe, one of the bikers who’s always crossing paths with Dalton in Road House, might be my favorite character in the whole movie. After their first scene together, I was hopeful it wouldn’t be a one-and-done and he would be around later on. Not only did I get my wish, but each interaction got better.
I lost my mind near the end of the movie where Moe told Dalton he was leaving town and that he only hung out with those goons because he really wanted to ride motorcycles, which was “hard to do in South Florida without a group.”
That Slo-Mo Closing Titles Sequence (Along With The Post-Credits Scene) Was Just Great
While I’m a sucker for a great opening titles sequence, I also get down with eye-popping closing credits sequences, as well. So, imagine how stoked I was after finishing Road House only to find a slo-mo segment. The way scenes from the movie would turn into slowed-down digital recreations with 3D effects hit me like I was listening to one of those “Chopped and Screwed” remix albums out of the Houston hip-hop scene for the first time back in 2005.
Oh, and that post-credits scene where Knox walks out of the hospital (I thought he was dead) like nothing happened was just the cherry on top.
The Fact That A Crocodile Ate Someone And Everyone Was Just Like 'Okay, Just A Normal Day In The Keys'
It’s no secret that Florida is a crazy place where anything and everything can happen, like a crocodile pulling a henchman below the surface, never to be seen again. I don’t know if the residents and police in Glass Key are used to massive reptiles just straight-up eating people, but I just kept wondering about the family of JD Pardo’s character and if they just went about their business saying, “Well, it’s Florida.”
I’m not mad about it (like Betty White in Lake Placid, I’m rooting for the crocodile), I just think it’s funny that it’s never brought up again.
Can We Get More Billy Magnussen Villain Roles?
With performances like Ben Brandt in Road House and Logan Ash in No Time to Die, Billy Magnussen has played some great villains in recent years, and I hope this continues. The way he brought the spoiled, bratty, and self-centered son managing the empire of an imprisoned crime boss to life was great, and added a nice touch to the movie.
Sure, he wasn’t as odd as Ben Gazzara’s Brad Wesley in the original Road House, but Magnussen did steal the show whenever he was on screen. What was up with that haircut though?
Was Road House a perfect movie? No, not really. But was it one of the wildest and most enjoyable experiences I’ve had with a 2024 new movie? You bet! It’s going to be hard to top this one…
