In no way do I believe a movie is only as good as its title and, in fact, I believe many of the films I have listed here are pretty good, if not great. However, if it were up to me, I would have opted to tweak their names a little, or maybe a lot. Let’s relive some of the worst, or even just blatantly untrue movie titles, in cinematic history… in my opinion, at least.
Dude, Where's My Car? (2000)
There is really nothing groundbreaking about Dude, Where's My Car?, in which two pizza deliverers (played by Ashton Kutcher and Seann Williams Scott) try to retrace their steps when they wake up with no memory of the bizarre previous night. Yet, there had to be a more imaginative name for this ridiculous comedy than a direct quote from Kutcher's character.
I Heart Huckabees (2004)
The official stylization for the title of David O. Russell's comedy about a husband-and-wife existential detective duo uses the emoji that typically symbolizes love. However, the symbol itself is actually pronounced in this case, resulting in the name I Heart Huckabees, which sounds like a child reading one of the "I Heart New York" T-shirts.
Lucky Number Slevin (2006)
I genuinely believe that the fun, surprise-filled crime thriller Lucky Number Slevin is one of Josh Hartnett's best movies. Yet, I also think the title (referring to a case of mistaken identity that puts the eponymous character in trouble with crime lords) is a pretty lackluster pun that likely cost better chances at the box office.
Ballistic: Ecks Vs. Sever (2002)
First of all, while the titular duo from Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever (played by Antonio Banderas and Lucy Liu, respectively) are enemies at the start, the main plot follows their collaboration, making the "vs." ultimately meaningless. Secondly, the word "ballistic" is associated with multiple definitions, none of which are at all appropriate to describe the story of this spy movie with a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes.
Who’s Your Caddy? (2007)
Outkast's Big Boi stars in Who's Your Caddy? as an Atlanta rapper who comes at odds with an uptight country club golf course owner. Even if this is not the worst movie about golf (although most would probably agree that it is), I think we can agree that it has the most irritatingly punny titles for a golf movie that anyone could conceive.
Quantum Of Solace (2008)
The term "quantum of solace" is defined as the minimum amount of comfort necessary to remedy a person's sorrow, which I think is an absolutely beautiful sentiment. However, I also believe that the phrase itself is an awkward mouth that sounds absolutely nothing like what a James Bond movie should be titled.
To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything! Julie Newmar (1995)
"To Wong Foo, thanks for everything! Julie Newmar" is a message found on the back of a photo signed by the 1960s-era Catwoman actor which our protagonists (played by Wesley Snipes, Patrick Swayze, and John Leguizamo) carry with them on a road trip. The phrase is obviously important to the story of this classic movie that celebrates drag but, as a title, it sounds like gibberish without the proper context.
John Carter (2012)
Did Disney assume that the title of the novel which John Carter is based on, Edgar Rice Burroughs' A Princess of Mars, might deter their male target audience? If so, maybe they should have realized that the astonishingly average name of the story's heroic protagonist (played by Taylor Kitsch) was far less appealing to any demographic.
You Don’t Mess With the Zohan (2008)
While neither considered one of the best or worst Adam Sandler movies but somewhere in the middle, most audiences who remember You Don't Mess with the Zohan might consider it culturally and politically tone-deaf. So, in that regard, I might be willing to say that the uproarious mouthful of a title for this comedy, starring Sandler as an Israeli counter-terrorist pursuing his dream of hairdressing, is not as embarrassing as the fact that it exists.
Freddy Got Fingered (2001)
Let's ignore the fact that Eddie Kaye Thomas' Freddy is not even the lead character of Freddy Got Fingered, which stars co-writer and director Tom Green as a wannabe cartoonist prone to surreal and grotesque hijinks. The title of this critically reviled comedy, which refers to a false abuse allegation against the main character's father, is simply disgusting.
Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot (1992)
Just by reading the feebly humorous title alone, you may have wondered why Sylvester Stallone ever agreed to star in Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot, which he later told Ain’t It Cool News was “one of the worst movies in the entire solar system.” It turns out the actor's then-rival, Arnold Schwarzenegger, tricked Stallone into taking the role by faking interest in the action-comedy, which the Terminator star confirmed to SlashFilm.
Surfer, Dude (2008)
Before Mathew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson shared the screen giving acclaimed performances on True Detective, they starred in this almost universally maligned comedy that was mocked long before it was released because of its title. I will never understand why Surfer, Dude – which, believe it or not, has no connection to McConaughey’s role in Harmony Korine’s The Beach Bum – includes the comma to pointlessly emphasize “dude.”
Operation Dumbo Drop (1995)
The actual Vietnam War-era elephant transport assignment that inspired Operation Dumbo Drop was called “Operation Barroom.” I suppose Disney wanted to take the opportunity to pay homage to one of their previous iconic movies about an elephant with the, admittedly, laughable title.
The Hottie & The Nottie (2008)
In The Hottie & the Nottie, Joel David Moore plays a man who, in order to woo his childhood crush (played by Paris Hilton), must help her significantly less attractive friend (played by Christine Lakin) find love first. Just as the makers of this Razzie-"winning" rom-com did not take into account how offensively unfunny the plot was, they did not seem to realize that a title that rhymes (by way of inventing a fake word) does not equal comedy gold.
We Bought A Zoo (2011)
We Bought A Zoo stars Matt Damon as a widowed father who takes over a rundown zoo in Southern California. While the title is taken from the memoir that inspired the dramedy directed by Cameron Crowe, that did not stop many people from jumping on the trend to dunk its almost laughably matter-of-fact nature.
Herbie: Fully Loaded (2005)
Considered one of both Lindsay Lohan and Michael Keaton's most embarrassing credits, Herbie: Fully Loaded sounds more like a Taco Bell menu item than a sequel to The Love Bug. Speaking of, I understand that naming the movie after the sentient 1963 Volkswagen Beetle himself might be better for brand recognition but what is wrong with using some variation of that adorable original name?
Edge Of Tomorrow (2014)
The action-packed, now beloved time loop movie Edge of Tomorrow is based on a Japanese manga called All You Need Is Kill, which director Doug Liman felt did not match the tone of the adaptation. However, I imagine he is kicking himself over rejecting that name as it would lead to the bland official title which often gets confused for its tagline "Live. Die. Repeat.," which also sounds better in my opinion.
Newsies (1992)
I understand that there are a lot of people who love this musical inspired by the true story of 1899's New York Newsboys strike, and starring a young Christian Bale. However, I must ask, do the fans agree that the film could have used a better title than Newsies?
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005)
While it is considered one of Robert Downey Jr.'s best movies and a non-traditional Christmas movie favorite by many, the title of Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is grossly misleading. However, in defense of the name, writer and director Shane Black's neo-noir dramedy (which also stars Val Kilmer) is loosely based on a novel by Brett Halliday called Bodies Are Where You Find Them.
Leonard Part 6 (1987)
The fact that Leonard Part 6 sounds like the sixth installment of a franchise actually has little to do with why the Bill Cosby-led espionage comedy was a critical and commercial failure. However, I am sure it did absolutely nothing to help make it more appealing to audiences.
Glengarry Glenn Ross (1992)
The best movie titles tend to roll off the tongue quite smoothly and, as far as I am concerned, Glengarry Glenn Ross (based on David Mamet's play about a real estate company in crisis) is most definitely not one such name. I feel like I have to prepare myself and make sure I don't make a mistake every time I try to say that tongue twister.
A Good Day To Die Hard (2013)
With the exception of its numbered first sequel, the Die Hard movies have been blessed with cool, unique titles (namely Die Hard with a Vengeance from 1995 and 2007's Live Free or Die Hard) but that streak ended with the puzzling A Good Day to Die Hard. Even Bruce Willis admitted, during an interview with The One Show on BBC, that he had trouble making sense of the title for the action movie franchise's fifth installment.
The Englishman Who Went Up A Hill But Came Down A Mountain (1995)
The best excuse for a movie with a far too long title is when the film is an intentionally ridiculous spoof, such as Don’t Be a Menace in South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood. However, the otherwise well-received Hugh Grant-led, romantic period dramedy, The Englishman Who Went Up A Hill But Came Down A Mountain, does not quite match the criteria.
The Constant Gardener (2005)
Director Fernando Meirelles' adaptation of John le Carré's 2001 novel, The Constant Gardener, was a widely acclaimed success, earning Rachel Weisz an Academy Award for her performance as the murdered wife of Ralph Fiennes' Justin. That being said, can we agree the title sounds like a story about someone who just spends all their time tending to plants?
Gigli (2003)
Writer, producer, and director Martin Brest's Gigli – starring Ben Affleck as the eponymous gangster and Jennifer Lopez as his lesbian handler – was heavily panned for multiple reasons. While the title was the least of critics' concern, some feel that the romantic crime dramedy's difficult-to-pronounce title is a prime example of when naming the movie after the main character does not work.
Layer Cake (2004)
Director Matthew Vaughn's Layer Cake is known as the film that practically earned Daniel Craig the opportunity to take over as James Bond in Casino Royale. However, had I not known it was a British mob thriller about a drug dealer given two challenging assignments on the eve of his long-awaited retirement, I would have assumed it was some rom-com about a couple who bond over their mutual love of baked goods.
Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil And Vile (2019)
I suppose it would have been a little too bland and on-the-nose to call Netflix's Zac Efron-led serial killer biopic something like The Ted Bundy Story. Yet, Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil and Vile – which is taken from a direct quote by a real judge involved in the serial killer's case – is too much of a mouthful is not quite catchy enough to make a lasting impression.
Mystic Pizza (1990)
A delicious food movie and one of the best Julia Roberts-led romantic comedies, Mystic Pizza is named after the restaurant where the three young protagonists (played by Robert, Lili Taylor, and Annabeth Gish). I cannot deny that it is a fantastic name for a pizzeria but, for a while, I was under the impression that the movie was about food with magical qualities as I had never heard of the town of Mystic, Connecticut, where the story takes place.
No (2012)
Based on the true story of an advertising campaign launched to persuade Chileans to vote "No" to extend dictator Augusto Pinochet's reign of power, No (starring Gael García Bernal) would receive an Oscar nomination for Best Foreign Language Film. However, can you imagine pitching this movie's title – "So, what's it called?" "No." "Hey, you’re the one trying to sell this to me. I should at least hear the name!" – or attempting to search it on IMDb? Believe me, I tried it myself.
The Day After Tomorrow (2004)
I imagine that the point of the title for Roland Emmerich's cautionary environmental disaster thriller is meant to sound foreboding. However, The Day After Tomorrow has always sounded mundane to me.
Aloha (2015)
I bet you can guess where Cameron Crowe's Bradley Cooper-led dramedy Aloha takes place. That is actually one of the biggest problems with the title, as far as I am concerned.
Phffft (1954)
The tagline for Phffft – a comedy about a divorced couple who keep bumping into each other while pursuing new love interests – was, "Don't say it – see it." I mean, how exactly are we supposed to say it, anyway?
