2/18 – 2/20 New movies come out each weekend; come here to find out which horrific dancing baby movie you will be avoiding. Three new wide releases this weekend, while it’s slim pickings in the art houses. Keep reading to find out how you should spend your movie going weekend:
Various Limited Releases
(Films opening 2/18 on less than 2 screens)
A lot of one screen releases this weekend, barely worth mention. Of them, I’ve got my eye on Downfall, a German drama about Hitler. It’s interesting, because Germans tend to ignore what happened in the war. Maybe ignore isn’t the right word, perhaps it’s better to say they just haven’t been comfortable with it. Who can blame them? This is one of the first German produced films to take a real look at Hitler. I’m not the history nut I used to be, but it’s the sort of thing that ought to pique just about anyone’s curiosity. Sadly, it’s only opening in one theater somewhere in New York, so not much chance most of us will get a shot at it this weekend.
Son of the Mask
(Opens 2/18 on 3000+ screens.)
Like Dumb and Dumberer, Son of the Mask is a sequel to a Jim Carrey movie that does not star Jim Carrey. I suspect he read the script, got to line two where it says “CGI dancing baby” and immediately began making fun of it through his ass. Then he called his agent and fired him for suggesting he read it. The Mask is a great movie (my favorite Carrey flick), but this sequel is anything but smokin. Instead of Carrey, it stars Jamie Kennedy, one of the least talented people to ever make a movie about white people who rap. He’s like the comedy version of Paul Walker. Pretty people aren’t funny, just look at Jimmy Fallon. Son of the Mask is a slapdash piece of Odin’s dung that dumbs down the original concept to cater to families instead of people who like to see green-faced men hump things. The release was delayed month after month after month until New Line finally decided to dump it in February where they’ll try to recoup as much cash as they can. Do your part to make it flop. See something else.
Because of Winn-Dixie
(Opens 2/18 on 3188 screens)
Based on a best-selling novel that no one has heard of, Because of Winn Dixie is not the touching story of flagging supermarket chain and the meat department that brought its employees together. Near as I can tell, it’s the story of Jeff Daniels' career bottoming out as he stars opposite a smiling dog in what appears to be little better than a Benji movie. Now smiling is a pretty good trick for a dog, and there’s certainly nothing wrong with taking your kids to see Son of the Benji, but there certainly doesn’t seem to be a lot worth getting excited about here. Unless you’re starved for movies to feed your young, Because of Winn Dixie offers little to recommend it. Some of the film’s marketing materials bear a strange resemblance to those used for Under the Tuscan Sun. I don’t think this actually signifies anything, except maybe a lack of originality, or an understandable longing for Diane Lane on the part of their promotional department. She’s actually too big a star now to be in this movie, which ought to be a really depressing thought if you’re Jeff Daniels.
Constantine
(Opens 2/18 on 3006 screens)
It’s a good bet that Constantine will be the biggest box office opener this weekend, and with good reason: the others cause brain rot. In it, Keanu Reeves fights demons and angels while looking a lot like he’s still in the Matrix, though he most certainly is not. Instead of Agent Smith he’s battling the Devil’s henchmen. Anyone who works for the Devil is either a really well dressed gay man or a flying monster thing with only the bottom half of a head. The Devil himself appears to be a big admirer of Charles Nelson Riley. Odd homophobic subtext aside, Constantine is your basic, big budget, big effects action flick. Sure, the subject matter might suggest something more, but the movie never quite delivers it. I expected to have more need of the gray matter between my ears while watching a movie about a guy battling the demons of hell to buy his way into heaven, but Constantine is quite content just to throw out a lot of fun spectacle. There’s nothing wrong with that, Keanu’s latest is a pretty entertaining ride. Give it a shot.
Still In Theaters and Worth Your Time: The Aviator, Finding Neverland, In Good Company, Sideways, Meet the Fockers, Hotel Rwanda, Million Dollar Baby, Ong-bak
