Too lazy to read all the wonderful news our insightful crew scours the globe to bring you every day? Too outmoded to have an MP3 player for the podcast? Shame on you all! However, being the generous lot we are, welcome to news:blended, your weekly guide to the most interesting stories reported on Cinema Blend over the last seven days.
Instead of watching the Super Bowl last Sunday, I was chaperoning eight tweens to that stupid Hannah Montana concert movie and then pizza. I did get to see the catch and the subsequent touchdown, so it turned out to be a pretty good day. It was also a good day for writer’s who found out the day before that they might get to work and earn back all the money they lost not working. Good luck with that.
SATURDAY
Writers might write again soon.
As I’m writing this, Revenge of the Sith is playing on HBO. Never has there been a greater example of why the continuation of the writer’s strike would be a good thing. I am embarrassed to listen to this dialogue. Oh wait, there’s a trailer for Welcome Home, Roscoe Jenkins. Well, it looks like there will be more badly written movies like these two in our near and far future. The writer’s strike will probably be over soon. Be afraid, be very afraid.
SUNDAY
Football sells movies.
Your daughters get everything they could ever want.
If you were so entranced by the Giants ruining the Patriot’s perfect season and reminding America why cheaters never prosper, you might have missed all the movie trailers. Don’t worry, we have them. I won’t name them all here, but they include the words Caspian, Drillbit, Semi-, and Iron, among others. A word that we don’t want to here again is Hannah. Ms. Montana and her fake hair won the box office war this weekend. I think it was because tickets were about twice what a kid would normally pay to see a movie. Plus, America is stupid. I’m stupid, I paid for 9 tickets.
MONDAY
Crisis averted.
Monday was a good day for things that howl in the night. First came word that there will be a Venom movie sometime. Venom is a Spider-Man character who showed up in Spider-Man 3 but was promptly forgotten when Peter Parker started dancing. Hopefully this spin-off won’t allow any jazz dancing. The other howl related news is that Joe Johnston will direct The Wolfman. Johnston is no Steven Spielberg but then again, he’s no Brett Ratner either. So count your blessings.
TUESDAY
Josh loves him some Michael Clayton.
Everyone loves them some Amy Adams.
Josh is not happy with the state of movies this year. More accurately, he’s not happy with the Oscars. Either way, the guy wishes Michael Clayton, Atonement, and even Juno never existed, or at least that they didn’t get nominated for big awards. I’m sure he’s right about the two movies I didn’t see, but he’s wrong about Juno. It’s ok, though, it happens. Amy Adams also happened, and we should all be glad she did. That gal could not be more wonderful. I even keep thinking she’s the gal that gave Vince Vaughn a handjob under the table in Wedding Crashers, but she’s not. No telling what she’s gonna do in the Night at the Museum sequel, but it’s going to be good.
No country for the Terminator.
Get ready to talk about Ruby Dee.
On Wednesday we found out that Josh Brolin is being considered to play the Terminator in the next movie in that franchise. What number are they up to now, 4? Shows you how much interest I have in time traveling killer robots. Brolin was great in No Country for Old Men and American Gangster, but I don’t see him as the Terminator. I don’t really see anyone as it, really; maybe they should just forget the whole thing. We aren’t forgetting the Oscars, though. It looks good that they will actually happen and we plan on talking about them. Not in person, because that would be scary, but in a chat room. Oscar Chat hosted by CinemaBlend will be the place to be on February 24th. Unless you have a girlfriend, of course. .
THURSDAY
Someone hates Juno more than you do.
James Bond’s gun is bigger than yours.
Since Josh had knocked Juno down, Mariana McConnell started kicking her. In fact, compared to Mariana, Josh’s comments qualify as a rave. She basically says that the music sucks but is still the best thing in the movie. The best thing in Quantum of Solace that next James Bond movie will not be the title, which is stupid. Hopefully it won’t be the poster either, since it’s kinda disappointing.
FRIDAY
Another reason to check out that Narnia rip-off movie.
I always thought the Eloise books were kinda cute. The Disney issued television movies were not so cute, they were more loud and annoying. They did sport Julie Andrews as Nanny. Apparently a big screen version of Eloise is coming with Uma Thurman playing the role previously played Andrews. If you don’t recognize Eloise, Disney, or Julie Andrews, just move along. You could move along to the new Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull trailer that will appear next week with the Spiderwick Chronicles. Please, don’t be one of those idiots who pays for a movie and then just watches the trailer, stands up, and conspicuously leaves. Get a girlfriend instead.
That’s all for another week of news blending. It’s like what you get at Jamba Juice, but cheaper and not quite as healthy. If you liked it or didn’t, leave some feedback.
