Too lazy to read all the wonderful news our insightful crew scours the globe to bring you every day? Too outmoded to have an MP3 player for the podcast? Shame on you all! However, being the generous lot we are, welcome to news:blended, your weekly guide to the most interesting stories reported on Cinema Blend over the last seven days.
I’m constantly surprised at which of the news items that I write get attention and comments. Usually it’s none of them, but occasionally, my writing touches a nerve. Once it was about Lyme Disease and now it’s about The Greatest American Hero. I could write about abortion, gun control, and global warming and not get the response I got on a minor piece about a guy in red pajamas. Go figure.
SATURDAY
Colin Farrell needs a hit movie to go along with all that great sex and money.
The thought of Atlas Shrugged makes Ed shrug.
Colin Farrell was famous for being the next big star. Then he was famous for being a drunken party animal. Now he’s famous for not starring in many good movies. Hopefully, he’ll actually get famous for what he’s supposed to be doing with his life, acting. Hope is the word for the people who are trying to bring Atlas Shrugged to the big screen. It’s not dead but it’s not really moving forward, exactly. Still, it might get made and we’d get to see Angelina Jolie do something besides pose for impromptu photos.
SUNDAY
I got your brain pill right here.
How about a Funny Bastard next time?
Shia LaBeouf has pretty much done everything right career wise, but he might be getting that much smarter soon. He’ll star in movie about taking a pill and getting brainy. That actually sounds a little dumb, so maybe he needs the pills in real life. We all need a little Gisele Bundchen in real life, but we don’t need more Austin Powers movies. They started to suck 5 minutes into the sequel. Now it looks like Gisele will suck in part 4. Well, not in that way.
MONDAY
We get scoops on movies you ignore!
This one caught me by surprise.
If you saw a movie called The Messengers, you don’t live in my house. Or probably on my block. For some reason, it will have a prequel and we got all the juicy plot details. The question is if anyone cares enough about the prequel to worry about the spoilers. People care about The Greatest American Hero and ended up commenting a lot on a story about Owen Wilson and everyone’s favorite superhero with a perm. I figured it would die a quick death like most everything else I write, but nope.
TUESDAY
The Ninth Old Man dies.
Hulk dresses badly.
As surprising as it might seem, someone who worked on animating Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs was still alive as recently as this week. Unfortunately, Ollie Johnston passed away and all of Walt Disney’s key animators from his glory years are now dead. As is Disney animation, mostly. Not dead is Edward Norton who is trying to revive the Hulk franchise with The Incredible Hulk. A poster came out and we criticized his outfit. That’s what we do.
We’ll show you you are wrong by proving that you are right.
Where in the world are my supersized fries?
As soon as we started our series on Bad Fandom, you knew this was coming. Katey took on the Browncoats Wednesday. They responded by demonstrating that everything she wrote in her article is absolutely true. Thanks guys and girls. We also interviewed Morgan Spurlock who is trying to get someone to see his lame documentary that followed up his lame television show that followed up his other documentary that some people liked. He’s supposed to be a very nice guy, but that doesn’t mean he should keep foisting himself on us. Although, I guess I foist myself on you also, so I don’t have any room to squawk.
THURSDAY
Hey, an actual good movie is being released this week.
This isn't what I thought it was.
Every week Scott Gwin gets us all ready for the new movie releases and what should happen at the box office. If you want to know what will likely be the 4th highest grossing new movie in any given week, Scott is your man. He’s also starting to get happy that the crap season for movies is ending and the movies we really want to see are now on the horizon. When Josh called Casey Affleck the new Fred MacMurray, I thought someone was planning a My Three Sons movie. Thank god that is not the case. It’s a new Ridley Scott movie, though, which is nothing to get happy about.
FRIDAY
He can't act, but boy those abs.
The dumbest explanation of a fight between a studio and star ever.
Bad Fandom finished off the week by taking on Channing Tatum (or his clones) fans. They haven’t responded as passionately as Whedonites, but that’s because most of them only read their cell phone texts, not actual full paragraphs. Edward Norton wrote a few paragraphs explaining his fight with Marvel over the final cut of The Incredible Hulk. He hasn’t actually help promote the film, though, and he blames that on the press. Way to show us, Edward! If the movie tanks and you’re reputation as a pain in the ass grows, that will really put us in our place.
That’s all for another week of news blending. It’s like what you get at Jamba Juice, but cheaper and not quite as healthy. If you liked it or didn’t, leave some feedback.
