Too lazy to read all the wonderful news our insightful crew scours the globe to bring you every day? Too outmoded to have an MP3 player for the podcast? Shame on you all! However, being the generous lot we are, welcome to news:blended, your weekly guide to the most interesting stories reported on Cinema Blend over the last seven days.
I can’t wait for the Justice League of America movie. I love all those guys, Flash, Hawkman, the Green’s Lantern and Arrow. I love the whole stupid Earth II thing and even minor characters like Black Canary and The Atom. Just make the damn movie already, it’s getting ridiculous.
SATURDAY
We review movies that are released on shiny replayable discs.
Apparently nothing happened on Saturday, since we didn’t have any stories. Take a look at our DVD reviews and see what happens after all this news ends and the movie actually gets made.
SUNDAY
Superbad good, The Invasion bad.
Rafe is geeky in glorious quadraphonic sound.
Superbad completed the Judd Apatow winning streak by kicking the piece of dung Rush Hour 3 out of the top box office spot. The Invasion didn’t do so well. Considering some of the reviews, though, the fact that it made more than about $40 should be seen as a gift. Maybe The Invasion needed more superheroes to pump up its geek audience. As this weeks Audio Blend showed, Rafe would have been there, as he is apparently the Geek King.
MONDAY
Exclusive Iron Man footage to be less so.
We’re still at the Locarno Festival talking to people.
One of the benefits of hanging around with other dateless losers at places like Comic-Con is to get exclusive looks at some anticipated movies. Then you go rub it in the faces of the people who were getting laid while you were watching a guy fly around in a metal suit. But now Jon Favreau says some of that exclusive footage from Iron Man will be released online soon. So, was it worth it, Temp? Miranda Pearson from out Switzerland bureau is keeping busy at the Locarno Film Festival. She just got an interview with Jim Threapleton, director of Extraordinary Rendition. So find out about his new movie and that whole terrorism thing.
TUESDAY
Logan 5 and Francis 7 are after you again.
His Dark Materials adaptation may not hate God enough.
As long as Logan 5 is still out there zapping anyone over 29 into dust, someone will want to make a movie about him. A long rumored but never quite made remake of the cheesy 1976 film starring Michael York seems to finally have a script and director. Now all it needs is an actual movie and then someone to watch it. An actual movie does exist for His Dark Materials: The Golden Compass. However, some people are afraid that all the god-hatin’ has been sucked out of it. If you can’t hate god in a sci-fi movie, where can you hate god? It’s just not right.
Fall movie preview previews Fall movies.
Fall movie preview so big it needed two parts to hold it all.
I lied, it actually needed three parts.
Summer and the Summer movie season are drawing to a close. That means the Fall movies are almost here and what would a new Fall season be without our patented movie preview sections. There are three (sections, not movies) available for your reading and perusing pleasure. Just make sure you don’t actually go see any of these movies, as most of ‘em look pretty damn bad.
THURSDAY
JLA might not have real actors at all.
Justin Timberlake takes it from Mike Myers.
If Warner Brothers ever releases a Justice League of America movie it will put an end to a cottage industry of conflicting rumors and half-assed guesses. The latest rumor is that the whole movie might be CGI rather than live action. Hawkman will still swing his mace, but only in the cyber world. Justin Timberlake is obviously a real person, not a CGI creation. But he’s going to be in a movie just like the pretend JLA characters. His movie will star Mike Myers as an advice giving guru. His first piece of advice for Justin should be “cash the check.”
FRIDAY
Unknown writer already has enemies.
Dallas movie moving forward towards sucktown.
I’m writing a sequel to Citizen Kane. I’m hoping someone will make it into a big movie and pay me $3 million for the script. I don’t think it will happen but it wouldn’t be any stupider than buying a script for a sequel to Ferris Bueller’s Day Off that some guy is hawking. Speaking of stupid, how about making a movie version of “Dallas,” the nighttime soap from way back when. Would you go see it? Would anyone?
That’s all for another week of news blending. It’s like what you get at Jamba Juice, but cheaper and not quite as healthy. If you liked it or didn’t, leave some feedback.
