Too lazy to read all the wonderful news our insightful crew scours the globe to bring you every day? Too outmoded to have an MP3 player for the podcast? Shame on you all! However, being the generous lot we are, welcome to news:blended, your weekly guide to the most interesting stories reported on Cinema Blend over the last seven days.
This is the space where I try to pull the wide world of CinemaBlend movie news stories for the week into a coherent whole. In some weeks that’s easier than others. An obvious theme presents itself or something really amazing happens that dominates the news. Other weeks there is really no rhyme or reason to the stories presented. See if you can guess which kinda week we just had.
SATURDAY
Virginia woman only steals a little.
Here’s a tip to anyone stupid enough to try it even for a few seconds. Ready? DON’T USE A RECORDING DEVICE DURING A MOVIE. Some woman in Virginia did just that in order to show 20 seconds of Transformers to her little brother and is now facing a year in the big house. Say what you will about the police and the theater chain, but this woman did something really, really dumb.
SUNDAY
Bourne remembers everything, including a trip to the bank.
Weekly Blend Audio is a party for your ears.
The Bourne Ultimatum led the way at the box office this last week, but we were more interested in how badly everything else did. All the other new releases were wastes of space so their poor box office puts the often maligned movie going public back in our good graces. After watching Matt Damon’s latest money maker, be sure to toss on your headphones and listen to the Weekly Blend Audio Show. They take on “twist” endings and Grindhouse on DVD.
MONDAY
Aerosmith inspires Dane Cook.
Tom Hanks hates literature.
I watched a trailer for Good Luck Chuck ready to hate the hell out of it. But I didn’t hate it as much as I thought I might. I don’t think I didn’t hate it enough to watch it, but I might not look down on those who do. One movie I would watch is a Frank Darabont version of “Fahrenheit 451” starring Tom Hanks. Not because I like Darabont or Hanks, but I just love to see things burn. Like Ralph Wiggum.
TUESDAY
Big star may get minor role in big movie.
Ridley Scott is a bit….off.
Tuesday was a good day for creative people who aren’t quite right in the head. Tom Cruise is being considered for the role of Captain Pike in the upcoming Star Trek movie. He’s an actor of some renown, I’ve heard. Then director Ridley Scott said he wanted to make a movie based on Monopoly. I think he’s funnin’ us, but if he isn’t, then I get to be the race car.
Early view of Pineapple Express.
Nobody actually gets different minor role in big movie.
Usually we don’t review movies a year before they open, but we’re all about Seth Rogan on this site. His 2008 offering, Pineapple Express was shown to a test screening audience and somebody there told us all about it. He said it was funny. Really funny. Not quite as funny was the news that in order to balance out the possible hiring of Tom Cruise on Star Trek, they hired a complete unknown to play Chekov. He’s a Russian actor and that’s a step-up from the pretend Russian they’ve always used previously. .
THURSDAY
CB goes to Switzerland.
Master and Commander and bad guy.
I’m not sure how we decided who to send to Switzerland to cover the Locarno Film Festival, but something tells me I wasn’t in the running. Miranda Pearlman went instead (or maybe she was going to be there anyway) and she wrote about some of the films she saw. Russell Crowe also wasn’t in Switzerland but he may be going into space. They need a bad guy in that Star Trek movie and he’s as good as any other. Maybe better.
FRIDAY
Remake of Bruce Lee movie will be the same, but different.
Viral video for Superbad is probably not real.
It has gotten to the point that remakes are pretty much just renting the name of a previously made successful film and attaching any plot you want to it. Someone is going to remake Enter the Dragon. That sounds bad but then you find out that he’s really only making a random kung fu movie and using the same name to help gain an audience. Another way to gain an audience is to put out funny videos that you pretend are real. That’s what the makers of Superbad did with a fake interview. Or is it?
That’s all for another week of news blending. It’s like what you get at Jamba Juice, but cheaper and not quite as healthy. If you liked it or didn’t, leave some feedback.
