Poor Planning: Most Places Have Run Out Of Eclipse Glasses

Regardless of what your idiot friends may have told you, looking directly at a solar eclipse without special precautions is not a good idea. Experts recommend fancy eclipse glasses for the best view. Unfortunately, most of us apparently suck at planning ahead, and now an overwhelming majority of places that sell such wares have run out.

At least that’s what Space.com is saying, a website which certainly sounds like it would know better than the rest of us. Luckily, for the last minute Charleys, there seems to be a few home remedies to skirt around not having the right gear. The first is to befriend a welder and borrow his work glasses. The second is to cut a hole in a sheet of paper, hold it up to the eclipse and then stare at the pavement below. The third is to do essentially the same thing as option two but to use a tree instead of paper.

Because the moon will only block roughly eighty-six percent of the sun, the resulting effect will look like a ring of fire. Unfortunately for many US residents, in addition to the glasses or the nifty tricks, potential viewers will also need to be located in the right place. Certain parts of Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, Utah, Nevada and California will get the best view, while most of the surrounding areas will see a more standard partial eclipse. Those on the East Coast will be shit out of luck since the sun will set in their fields of vision prior to the eclipse, but since those bastards get TV shows a few hours earlier anyway, I don't feel bad.