Why Big Brother's Nicole Voted For Holly To Win Over Jackson Michie

For the majority of the season, I said, 'Wow, if Michie makes it to the end, I’m voting for him.' He is a competition beast and had a tremendous social game in manipulating but keeping people close to him. It was very well done. But in the last week, I spoke a lot with Holly in the backyard. I’ll admit Holly was someone I discredited, someone I viewed as being with and behind Michie. The more I spoke to her about her strategy to lay low in the beginning and take out people like Sam and Nick. She’s good at mental comps. In the final HoH, she was so close to Michie in Part 1, and she blew me out of the water in Part 2. And I’m supposed to be really good at those! It made me look at her in a new light, that she has a strategy very close to my own. If I wanted to be respected on a game level, she deserved that respect as well. I assumed the jury would vote for Michie. But I wanted my vote to be a 'hoo-rah!' for people who are underestimated.

I definitely believe if Holly had won, there would have been more consideration. She’s very smart and considered her options against me. But I think their showmance was unbreakable; they’ve been together since the beginning of the season. That’s like having Cliff and me at the end in terms of season-long duos. You’re going to pick your person. In retrospect, I look at the decision between Tommy and Holly, and I go back and forth in my head. The ultimate decision came down to who I thought I could beat, and I thought mental comps were coming. I thought Holly was worse at those than Tommy, but that was her strategy. She really got me; she played a lot dumber than she is. She’s a freaking genius!

Nicole was underestimated a lot in this game. A lot of people tried to use her and manipulate her. They saw her weaknesses and that she played with her heart. I sat her down at multiple times throughout the game and said, 'Nicole, you play with your head and your heart. That’s why I love you and respect your game. Do what is best for you and your game, and that’s it.' I always had her back and I was always there for her. I perceived her as preying on my weaknesses and trying to strongarm me. And I get it from the game perspective; I’m empathetic to it. But at that moment, I was so frustrated because I felt like I was being backed into a corner that I shouldn’t have been forced into.

In my mind, the past couple of years I've been through some instances where people were not very nice to me. I was never bullied as a kid but I was bullied as an adult, which is very odd. So coming into this process, I just didn't expect people to care about me, to kind of dismiss me.

It was a bitter pill going to Final Three with a showmance and knowing my goose was cooked. But America’s Favorite made it all worth it. It’s better than anything I could have ever wished for or dreamed of. I sat in my bed last night overcome with emotion. I’m in that house, and I’m just Nicole from Long Island, doing my thing. I’m a girl living in a house doing my best. I don’t think of myself as anything more than that. To come out and hear so many people support me and love me is something I can’t even fathom. I’m so thankful that people care about me. It’s amazing.