Welcome to the Villains show! It’s all Villains, all the time, as we witness Parvati jiggle in and out of everyone’s mind. It seems that every single Villain knows that not only is Parvati a malicious, manipulative flirt, but she will most certainly jump ship when they merge with the Heroes. But who is going to actually do something about it? Jerri swings from admiration, where she wishes she could bottle Parvati, to disgust, where she wants to punch Parvati in the face. Coach, Randy and Russell lie to their confessionals about not falling for her charms, while the cameras pick up their goofy smiles and helpful hands. Coach even spends some time describing her skimpy bathing suit and how much it is not affecting him, between his meditation poses and quoting Martin Luther King Jr. Ah, I just love these slowly fracturing egos….
Back at Heroes camp, two people are emerging as Villains-in-training. James is the vocal Villain, who can’t seem to take his own advice and keep his mouth shut. Meanwhile, JT starts to manipulate Cirie against Candice, which sends Candice into a tailspin of paranoia. JT realizes that he betrayed his alliance with Tom during Tribal Council, and he tries his best to keep Tom in his pocket. He is playing a subtle game, and out of all the tribe members, I think Cirie is the one most likely to figure it out. Also, I would like to ask anyone why they even bother talking to James about anything at this point. Not only will he freak out, he will do it loudly enough to embarrass you in front of your entire tribe and the people watching at home, and after that, he will start to orchestrate a plot to vote you out – simply because you bug him.
The challenge was most certainly a grudge match to be remembered. The Heroes, most likely after eating what Tyson called “steroid sandwiches”, played the sumo duffel bag hard and fast. Meanwhile Jerri laughed as Colby turned into the Incredible Hulk, his veins pulsating as he rooted his team on. Poor Jeff couldn’t even duck the friendly fire as Coach responded to his call for a do-over with a resounding middle finger. Every single match was won by the Heroes. But this didn’t stop Tyson from giving his old tribemate JT a creepy kiss on the cheek. It finally came down to the Villains’ last hope: Randy, who tried his best to psyche out James but, again, do yourself a favor and just try not to talk to this man. He is like a lion with a thorn in his paw. Courtney got a great burn at the easily-excitable gravedigger as the Heroes headed back to their camp in victory: “Told you you were on the wrong team, James.” Is Court’s last name Palpatine?
Parvati seemed to win everyone back when it came to the votes. But one thing about voting Randy out seemed to make the most sense, after literally being pummeled into the mud by the Heroes: the next time they have to play a challenge, the Heroes will have to sit out a male member of their team. Other than that, it seemed to make the most sense to vote her out. I will save my argument that Parvati is actually a Veela for another time. Until then, I’ll be looking for my machete. I know I left it around here somewhere….
