I always have a great time watching Survivor, yelling at the screen with my wife – cheering on our favorites and booing our not-so favorites. When I heard it was Heroes vs. Villains, I just had to write about it! I will be here with you, every week, covering the alliances, the blind sides, the lowdown dirty shameful things that these seasoned connivers do to stay in the game. To me, it really isn’t about heroes and villains. It’s about how they play the game, if they play it at all.
First up, it was like Samoa was getting invaded with the four Air Force helicopters swooping around, the Survivor cameras catching them in their majesty. The Heroes landed first. It was great to see this bunch. A lot of them were favorites of mine in the past; specifically the big-hearted pirate Rupert, the unlucky James and the last woman standing Stephenie.
But the best part about the opening would have to be the Villains’ entrance. As the helicopter landed, the music score changed into a more sinister tone, really playing up the theme. As Courtney, Sandra and Parvati made light protests that they were not villains; Jerri noted that she was wearing the black hat happily, and Colby just so happened to be wearing a white one. Boston Rob also pointed out that the Heroes might be suffering from a bit of an ego problem to start off with. It was fun getting to see everyone take quick stabs at each other, before a brutal first reward challenge began.
It was teams of two on two. All they had to do was go to one end, dig up a beanbag, and get it past their own finish line. What it turned into was a wrestling match that the Romans would be proud of. It started with a dislocated shoulder. But Steph, with the medical team’s assistance, popped it back in place and was good to go again. Even Jeff took a moment to laugh at her determination to stay in the game. Steph is going to be tougher to take down than that, Jeff.
Rupert broke a toe, which I worry will come back to haunt him. But the highlight of this first hour would have to be the wrestling match between Sandra and Sugar, where the pin-up blonde unpinned her bra to wriggle out of the housewife’s clutches! She ran topless to seal a Heroes victory, much to everyone’s delight, and then turned around to give Sandra two middle fingers! Ok, a little immature, but hey, it sure was memorable!
And so the game really begins. My boy Russell from last season started playing right away, gaining a quick alliance with Danielle and a wary alliance with Parvati. He is out to prove he is the best and he wasn’t afraid to tell us that about ten times during the two hour premiere. On the Heroes beach, Amanda was praising their good karma and moments later, the tribe netted four chickens that wandered out of the jungle. Rupert spoke for the tribe when he said, “It’s good to be a hero.”
Two star-crossed lovers connected as Day One ended. The Black Widow and the Dragon Slayer cozied up so much that night that it turned into high school the next day. Coach flexed and puffed as Russell and Parvati spoke of Jerri’s affection for him. Meanwhile, Sandra and Courtney practically had a giggling pillow fight as they tried to talk Jerri into going for Coach. The two talked about it, Jerri not wanting to be alone. But little did she know that Coach’s heart was soon to be won away from her.
Sourpuss Randy tried to talk Boston Rob out of using a bunch of energy to make a fire, but Rob showed us all what he is still about when he got it going, with some bamboo and elbow grease. Coach fell for him at that moment, I think. He is in awe of Rob, admitting his feelings as sort of a bromance. Rob is most certainly going to use this to his advantage, as he nearly gets Coach to climb a tree to prove his worthiness. This pathetic reflection of the once proud Dragon Slayer was kind of ridiculous to watch. I look forward to seeing what he does when Rob stabs him in the back. Chances are he won’t see it coming.
On the Heroes beach, the alliances started piling up. First we had JT and James, then Amanda and Cirie, then Tom and Steph and then Tom and JT. The smartest one by far was Tom’s reason for allying himself with JT. Since they are both winners, if they end up in the final two positions, then their respective million dollar budgets cannot be held against them. Meanwhile, in another part of the jungle, Candice tried to explain to Colby who each of his teammates were. Come on, Colby! If you continue to come back to these All-Star events with your perfect teeth and your Gillette endorsement, do yourself a favor and watch the show that made you so famous!
As Day 3 began, it appeared the sun was already getting to Tom as he started making some sort of comparison between which chicken to kill and who to vote off if he had to. My interpretation is that if his tribemates did not start producing eggs, he would need to vote them off. Did I get that right, Tom? Also, Colby was probably wishing he had a cup of coffee after Sugar tried bonding with him all night long.
The immunity challenge was pretty much two puzzles and a boat race. They had to assemble a boat, race it to get flame and then take puzzle pieces and do a four-layer puzzle. Amanda, Cirie, Rupert and Sugar lost the Heroes’ huge lead by choking on the puzzle. The Villains won and Sugar cried. Jeff, ever the gentleman, made sure to essentially point and laugh at her in front of both tribes.
My favorite part of Survivor, the lead-up to tribal council, was not much of a scramble. The two factions of the Heroes group debated whether or not to vote Sugar out. Tom pointed out that Sugar was a follower, why not take out the head of the other faction, Cirie? At the same time, Cirie debated whether to take out Tom or Stephenie. Then again, why take out a player who could help the team physically, when they could take out the weakest member?
As it turned out, both factions must have decided that in order to stay strong, they should take out their weakest player. Sugar didn’t put up much of a fight at tribal as the rain started to pour down on the crestfallen Heroes. And with a 9-1 vote, Sugar meekly made her way out.
