Wow, Lydia and mimosas are an ugly combination. Tonight’s episode featured the exit of one bad attitude and the rising up of a new force of negativity and this one is stuck wearing a spandex superhero costume.
Ah, yes, the return of the BB unitard. We’ll get to that in a little bit. Right now, let’s talk about Chima because after tonight, we won’t need to talk about her ever again! (insert cheering here) After the death… err, I mean eviction of Jessie (it’s easy to confuse the two judging by the post-eviction reaction we saw on Sunday night), Michele nominated Chima and Natalie for eviction. Rather than holding out hope for a Veto win, Chima reacted by pouting and napping. When the houseguests found a miniature-golf setup in the backyard, Kevin went in to wake Chima up in an effort to get her enthused for the Veto comp. Chima conceded, leaving her mic-pack in the bedroom and going out back to practice putting.
Part of the whole Big Brother game is that Big Brother is boss. It’s a pretty simple concept. When Big Brother tells you to put your mic-pack on, you do it. Chima refused. And we got a montage of clips of Chima defying Big Brother dating back to the sixth day in the house. She doesn’t want to go to the diary room. Big Brother has to wait. She doesn’t feel like having the camera on her so she covers it with a blanket. She feels threatened by the Coup d’etat so she announces that she’ll go nuts if it’s used and get the FCC all over CBS. She even used the word “threat” when she made that remark just to make it clear to Big Brother who’s in charge. Guess what Chima? You’re not in charge. You’re on a game show. You signed a contract. It’s a game and Big Brother calls the shots.
Cut back to the present when Chima refuses to get her microphone, resulting in Kevin, who is desperately trying to push Chima back toward playing the game despite her diva-ness, going to the bedroom to retrieve it. What does she do with it? She tosses it straight into the hot tub and resumes the golf practice. Big Brother tells her to get another microphone and she ignores the command. Kevin, again runs off to get it and attempts to put it on her. She lets him and then takes it off, laughing at how hilarious her petty defiance is.
Later in her room, she’s cuddled up under the covers again as Natalie and Lydia attempt to get Chima’s head in the game. They talk about the Veto and how they’ll be in power soon. It’s a valiant effort but the damage is done. Chima is called to the diary room and when she ignores the request, BB exec-producer Allison Grodner gets on the loud-speaker and repeats the request. That’s right. Big Brother is really here. While the BB character is little more than that generic male voice over a speaker, Grodner’s the woman behind the wheel and when she says come, you come. Ok, maybe others might’ve sworn into their microphone again as Chima did earlier but this time, she got up and went to the diary room. When she got in there, they told her not to sit down. No Chima. No comfy chair for you. You’re going out the backdoor.
While this is happening, Kevin, Lydia and Natalie talk about what Chima did with the mic-pack. Kevin knows that’s a big no-no. Equipment like that isn’t cheap and it’s probably against the rules to destroy it like that. Lydia and Natalie both tried to claim that Chima dropped it, as though they’re forgetting there are cameras everywhere. Had Chima been standing anywhere near the hot tub their defense might have worked but come on! She threw it.
Kevin had a feeling Chima wasn’t coming back and that was confirmed when Grodner told the Houseguests to go into the living room. She announced that due to Chima willfully breaking the microphone, she’d been eliminated from the competition. Adios, Chima. It’s been real.
Once the houseguests split up, Natalie instantly wanted to blame Michele for driving Chima to do what she did. Because I guess a thirty-two year old woman isn’t capable of making her own decisions and controlling her behavior. All Michele did was nominate her. If every houseguest acted like Chima did post-nomination there would be no show. Natalie complained about Chima’s HoH being taken from her. Now, putting aside the fact that it’s a game and they need to “expect the unexpected,” Chima not only had complete safety from Jeff’s power, which was something only Kevin, as Veto holder also had but she also got to play in the next HoH competition. So I think Natalie was wrong when she said, “It couldn’t have not got worse for her,” but I could be wrong because I think there might be a double-negative somewhere in there.
Lydia was actually the voice of reason in that conversation, telling Natalie that it was pointless to obsess over blame. They needed to regroup and figure out what to do to ensure their own safety going forward. What? They’re playing a game? I nearly forgot.
Michele announced to the houseguests that due to Chima’s early departure, her reign as HoH is over. That sucks for Michele as she only got about two minutes of being HoH before it was taken away from her. Then again, thanks to fast-forward-rounds in previous season, there have been shorter HoH terms in Big Brother history.
The BB producers turned the scheduled Veto competition into a new HoH comp, wherein the houseguests had to hit an oversized golfball with a big golfclub down around a snail and toward the hole-in-one cup. If they missed the cup, the ball went into a section of a spinning wheel behind the setup. As each of the sections was numbered, the goal was to get the lowest score. A hole-in-one was one point and the wheel sections were numbered from 2 through 7. The houseguest with the highest score in the round was eliminated and got to choose a platter which contained a prize, one of which was the HoH title. The twist was, the next eliminated houseguest had the option to keep the prize they won or else exchange it for someone else’s prize.
Lydia was eliminated first and she ended up winning the HoH title. She announced in the DR that she just knew someone was going to take it from her. You think? So she sat down and started guzzling mimosas while she watched the competition play out. Natalie went out next and won a trip to Hawaii. Knowing someone would just take the HoH prize from her if she traded with Natalie, she opted to keep the trip. Russell was eliminated next and he went for Natalie’s trip, handing her the call from home he selected as his prize. Natalie cried in appreciation, as though Russell had given her a present. He stated, “I didn’t do it for you. I took the trip.” That made me chuckle but it wasn’t just rudeness that prompted Russell’s response. As he explained in the diary room, he doesn’t want to give whoever gets HoH any reason to think he was being nice to Natalie. He knows he’s on shaky ground with everyone in the house and he needs to keep his loyalties out in the open.
Kevin was eliminated next, winning $5k. He kept the money, leaving Jordan and Jeff to duke it out in the final round. When Jordan scored a five, Jeff’s response to this wasn’t to go and get yet another hole-in-one. Instead, he hit the ball hard enough to knock it out of the set-up entirely, handing Jordan the win and the option to select whatever prize she wanted. After Jeff traded his massage treatment for Russell’s Hawaiian vacation, Jordan opened the last prize and found the Captain Unitard costume. Lydia was already announcing to Jordan at that point that Jordan was little more than a puppet and a ho-puppet at that. Too much champagne and vitamin D will do that to a girl when she’s been sitting out in the hot sun long enough, I guess.
Jordan handed Lydia the unitard and took the HoH prize. When Lydia started tossing around the ho-word, Jeff intervened and told her she needs to watch what she calls people. And they say chivalry is dead! Not only does he give his girl the HoH but he also stands up to her against the bitter, inebriated tattooed chick. Do these girls really wonder why America handed him Jessie’s eviction on a silver platter?
After the competition, Lydia continued to run her mouth, trying to pick a fight with Michele, who responded by telling her to go put her unitard on (“bitch.”) Lydia responded by pouring Michele’s beer down the sink and throwing some food away. Burn!
Jeff tried to appeal to Lydia, reminding her that they’re playing a game and it should be fun. It was fun enough when Lydia and her people had the upper hand and Jeff and Jordan’s friends were being evicted willy-nilly but I guess losing just doesn’t have the same sparkle to it.
Lydia went to sob in the DR while Jeff attempted to get Kevin and Natalie to get their girl in check. Their defense was they tried and Natalie stated simply that you can’t make people get along. That much is true and just as Michele isn’t responsible for what Chima did, Natalie and Kevin can’t be held accountable for Lydia being a sore loser (or a mean drunk).
Lydia sat out of Jordan’s exciting HoH room reveal and the tearful reading of the letter as Jordan pictured her family watching the show and then calling each other up to discuss it afterward as the letter described.
The Captain Unitard costume, which was a snazzied up version of the old red unitard we’ve all come to know and despise seemed to perk Lydia up as she pranced around in her cape and newly dyed pink hair but they all knew the Jordan-hammer was about to fall. I doubt anyone was surprised that Jordan nominated Lydia and Natalie. She told Kevin just after he was eliminated from the competition that he was safe and while I don’t think Jeff or Jordan completely trust Russell, now’s not the time to cut him loose.
The preview-announcement for Thursday’s episode promises a live Veto competition, elimination and a new HoH comp, which will serve as the semi-fastforward round they had planned for this week before Chima sealed her own fate. I think it’s a done deal for Natalie unless she or Kevin wins the Veto. If Kevin wins it and uses it to save her or Lydia, Jordan will have to put up Russell or Michele (she wouldn’t put up Jeff), leaving Kevin, Natalie/Lydia, Michele/Russell and Jeff to vote. In that case, as long as Michele/Russell and Jeff vote to evict Natalie or Lydia (whichever is left up on the block), it goes to a tie and Jordan would break it, sending Natalie or Lydia home. So either way, the “evil” people (according to Lydia) are safe for that round but after that there’s a new HoH competition and the tables can be turned. We’re also looking at substantially dwindled numbers at this point and come next week, the Veto is going to start to become just as important as the HoH.
