There’s a reason why Whitney never gets a front-burner storyline: she puts the bored in boardroom. A Hills without Heidi is an empty experiment in poor plot making. The focus on Whitney’s presentation at the Teen Vogue office in New York clearly served to cover up some lapse in time when the most exciting thing happening in Speidi territory was Spencer’s ignored voicemail to Brody. Perhaps this is the time when Heidi decided to come out about her plastic surgery to the press? Whatever it was that kept Heidi away from the cameras better be as fleeting as Lauren’s interest in Gavin (yes, that is the wallpaper she dated last week) because a Heidi whose only dramatic importance is to support Spencer in his unimportant friendship decisions is like a Lo who thinks before she speaks (read: uninteresting).
Whitney brought a pleased Lisa Love to the church she picked out for the Teen Vogue Young Hollywood Party. Although Lauren didn’t seem to have any role in the planning process, she still got to go with Whitney on the redeye to New York to accompany her in the boardroom. Whitney was relieved to know that Lauren would be by her side during the dreaded presentation, but her reassurance was shattered when Teen Vogue editor-in-chief Amy Astley informed Lauren that she’d be visiting Marc Jacobs’s studio for the day. As Whitney flubbed her presentation which was somehow praised by Amy, Lauren shared a downright anticlimactic greeting with Marc Jacobs. The most riveting piece of drama: Whitney—who apparently doesn’t do well with Casual Fridays—overdressed for the New York presentation and Lisa Love mocked her for it.
The way it all played out was fishy—the logistical questions continue to abound: Why would Lisa send Lauren to New York just to play around at Marc Jacobs’s studio? Why did Amy give a good report to Lisa about Whitney’s presentation when she disagreed with all of her suggestions? And how was everyone else besides that totally star-struck stylist at Marc Jacobs’s studio not speechless when they met Lauren?
Spencer’s run-in with Frankie outside of Bolthouse revealed something more shocking than anything that happened in New York: Frankie does some freelance (is that what they call it in the PR world?) work for Brent. Take-home lesson: Brent is a complete Hills publicity whore who’ll make use of the most minor of characters for any business. Frankie told Spencer that Brody tried to call him on his birthday. After defending his anti-Brody sentiments to Heidi in a surprisingly sensible manner, Spencer left a voicemail on Brody’s phone, telling him they needed to talk. Brody, though, was too busy cuddling with Lauren as they promised they’d support each other forever and he decided he’d ignore the voicemail altogether. Enough already with the Lody (even the name isn’t as elegant as Speidi!) pimping. Speidi brainwashing beats Lody wishy-washiness any day—even the day Heidi isn’t on.
