I swear that this has been the fastest season of Survivor ever. It truly seems like the show just started. But, I guess it also doesn’t seem like we are at the end of 2008, either – so maybe my life is just moving too fast. Just a few days ago, we all learned that Sugar is truly the mastermind that deserves to win when she orchestrated the departure of Crystal.
I tried to feel a bond with Crystal, because she’s a mom, like me, but she just seems so mean sometimes, and I just am not feeling it. Now, if they can just get rid of Kenny, I will be happy with ALL four finalists. That has never happened before for me. In fact, all of the seasons, only Ethan, Terry and Yul were my picks from day one. I loved Yul!
Anyway, after Crystal got the boot, they tribe headed back to the camp. Kenny was straight up ticked that Bob didn’t give him the idol – and Bob called him out and asked him why he doesn’t win his own idol. Kenny tries to make him out to be dishonest, but the rest of the tribe applauds him for taking a stand.
The next morning, Bob and Sugar are sitting by the fire and she explains that she and Matty would like to be with him at the final three. Problem is, Kenny is not trusting her, so she’s got to smooth things over with him. She walks with him to get tree mail, and convinces him that she is not targeting him. Dude, this girl so deserves to win!
For the next challenge, each tribe member has to make themselves up like a warrior. They get some paints, beads and fabric and Suzie looks seriously scary. In a good way. The first part of the challenge is to dig yourself under a fence, and Suzie smokes it! Next a plank maze – and if they fall they have to start over. Suzie smokes it again! Next untying knots and through a gate, Sugar and Suzie are first through. Finally, a maze and 25 Gabonese huts looking for bags of puzzle pieces. Three trips and three bags – Sugar is first to the top with all of her pieces, with Bob close behind. Bob wins Immunity! That is 5 straight challenges for the old guy and if his skirt were any shorter, he would need two hairdos to wear it!
Kenny feels super confident that he is not on the chopping block, and Matty tells him that they are going to tell Suzy she’s next – but they are waiting till later in the day. She knows something is up, because no one is talking to her. They head to tribal and it still seems to be up in the air.
Tribal is priceless just for seeing the reactions from the peanut gallery. Randy and his expressions are awesome. I love that he is not in the final anything.
And, Kenny is so not an outdoorsy guy that he doesn’t even know how to talk about fishing – he says that Bob “does” fishing. Too funny. He also tells the jury about his outrage over Bob keeping the necklace at the last tribal, but then everything about Kenny trying to blindside Bob washes out, and Kenny looks like a half-assed strategist. Man, I hope they get rid of this little rat.
Voting commences, votes are tallied, there aren’t any hidden idols left to play, and it’s K-E-N-N-Y! Woo-freaking-hoo! Damn I’m happy!
And we are down to the final four! And we are at the most worthless, time-wasting part of the whole season. Paying respect to the 14 “fallen” Survivors is dumb. They say something nice about everyone, and we get to see a little blurb about each one. Yeah, it’s pretty much just to remind us who else was on the show so we are refreshed for the recap show. The only good part of this segment is DAN! Man, I forgot about Dan. I really wanted him to win…
This may have been the best one ever – because they didn’t have anything nice to say about Corinne or Randy. Aw, and Randy realized that it IS okay to make friends. What the hell happened to this guy that he is so bitter and twisted?
At the top of the hill waiting for the tribe is a real tribe waiting to help them burn the effigies of their comrades. The masks they had for each person was pretty cool – better than torches for sure.
And finally, after 7 solid minutes of commercials, we get to the final immunity challenge. The final four have to build a ten foot tall house of “cards”, or whoever has the tallest in 30 minutes. Sugar was doing great, but after 5 ½ ft, it falls. Second time, Sugar gets to 6 ft, and it falls. Matty and Bob are taking their time and doing it right – I think Matty is gonna take it. Why can’t Bob do this? Isn’t he a Physics teacher? Isn’t this a structure? Shouldn’t this be easy?
Un-freaking-believable – SUZIE wins immunity. Not that I am upset, just shocked.
Sugar is pretty upset, because she got rid of Kenny thinking Suzie would be easy to knock out. She was actually crying, and I’m so sad that Bob is going. He totally deserves to win the whole thing. And he totally takes the whole thing like a man. He’s so sweet and nice about it. Do you think Suzie will mess up and vote herself out? Yeah, probably not.
Sugar is totally attaching her dead dad feelings on Bob, and she is working her magic to keep him – she tells him to vote Matty, and she will vote Matty, pushing a tie and leaving it up to fate. That is so dangerous, because that could take Sugar out of the running too. But as Sugar says, it’s like putting her “dad” (Bob) up against her “brother” (Matty) – and she’s gonna choose daddy every time.
I am SO torn! I like Matty, I like Bob – I don’t want either to go. If there is one thing I hate, it is being indecisive. Matty heaps some burning coals on Sugar’s head when he says that he would never stab Sugar in the back. And Sugar confesses that she loves both Matty and Bob. And that bitch Corrine rolls her eyes and acts like she’s the shit. Man, I hate her. She’s so awesome at everything that her ass is sitting on the jury.
Anyway, they vote, it’s a tie – and after a fire-making challenge Bob wins. Poor Matty. More than anything I’m mad because Corrine gets what she wants.
So, Day 39 and tree mail is no mail, just a feast. They are eating up, and Sugar tells us that she knows she’s got no chance to win. They tear down their huts and torch ‘em. Man it goes up fast, and according to editing makes the wildlife flee.
It’s time for the ousted members to confront, I mean question the final three. Randy and Corrine are using this time, basically, to bitch out the final three for not keeping them. I guess they never got the memo about Survivor being a game of making alliances and maintaining relationships with people you aren’t aligned with. Duh.
Suzie tells everyone she deserves it because she “tried”, and that’s great because everyone deserves to win because they gave it a shot. Bob claims he didn’t outwit or outplay anyone, but I’d say the five immunity idols might speak differently. Sugar says she deserves it ‘cause she did it all on her own as a free agent. She better come up with something better than that.
Charlie comes out swinging at the ladies, wanting to know why the two lowest ranked players deserve to get his vote now. And then he wants Bob to admit he kind of liked cuddling with Charlie.
Crystal basically says Sugar’s got her vote, and wants to know why Bob deserves to be there. Oops, until Sugar tells her she’s a bully.
Kenny is pissed at Sugar for voting him out, and doesn’t believe her when she says she thought he was a bigger threat. He confronts Bob about the idol fiasco, and doesn’t hear what he wants.
Oh, here goes Corrine. She offers Suzie her vote if she will remove her vocal chords. She tells Bob she wants him to be nasty – and it’s gotta be aimed at Sugar. Then she tells Sugar she is an uneducated leach. Sugar flips her off and I have never been so proud of her.
Marcus plays the role model card on Suzie, and then asks Sugar if she would give part of her money to a cause. He wants to know when Bob took control of his own decisions.
Randy rants and raves and asks Suzie why she feels sorry for him. He tells her she’s dumb, and she explains that it was because he seems so sad. He yells at Sugar for laughing at him and making him look like an ass. Sugar says he did that all by himself. He goes off on Bob for tricking him – and Bob tells him he is truly sorry. Sugar backs him up when she acknowledges that Bob let her have it for laughing at him.
Matty looks like a total pothead (but I still love him) and pretty much lets Sugar have it for being evil. Sugar cries over Kenny and gives Bob the chance to say that neither Sugar nor Suzie deserve the money more than he does.
The final vote commences after six full minutes of commercials. Have I mentioned how much I hate commercials?? Probst reminds the jury that this time they want to write down the name of the person they WANT to win.
Matty votes Suzie, Corrine votes Bob, Kenny struggles, and then Probst takes off with the votes to LA. I love the segway to live – it’s always so realistic…
At least everyone is clean now, and looking healthy – all but Bob that is. Can Bob look like anything but nipples on ribcage? But he looks so cute in his tie, with his hair slicked over. You know he looked JUST like that in his Kindergarten picture (minus the beard and mustache of course).
Votes – Suzie -1, Bob -1, Suzie -1, Suzie -1, Bob – 1, Bob – 1, TIE. One more vote, and the winner is BOB. Since Bob and my dad are about the same age, I’m thrilled that the old guy pulled it off.
Check out the recap for the reunion show later!
